Tom Antion Speaking: Assistant Humor

=> Congratulations. This is the earliest you have ever been late.

=> An angry boss yelled, "YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN HERE AT 8:00."
The reply, "Why? What happened?"

=> A ten minute coffee break a day equals over 43 hours over the
course of a year . . . hey that's a week's vacation.

=> Sign: When everything else fails, why not try what the boss
suggested?

=> Administrative assistant test:
Can you say the following? If so, you're hired.

"She hasn't come in yet."
"I expect her any minute."
"She called to say she would be a little late."
"She came in, but had to leave."
"She's gone to lunch."
"She should be back from lunch any minute."
"She's not back from lunch yet. May I take a message?"
"She's in the building."
"She's away from her desk."
"I'm not sure whether she'll be back or not."
"Sorry. She's gone for the day."
"Sorry. She's left the company."

=> Boss: "Don't discuss your paycheck with others."
Employee: "Don't worry. I'm as ashamed of it as you are."

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