Public Speaking Humor

=> If we had an instant replay camera like the NFL has we could
watch that joke die again.

=> I asked the meeting planner what I should talk about. He/she
said, "about 20 minutes."

=> GOOD SPEECH FORMULA: Have a good beginning; a good ending; and
keep them close together.

=> He who hesitates is probably right.

=> No one is listening until you make a mistake.

=> Two wrongs are only the beginning.

=> The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch
up.

=> If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of
payments.

=> Love may be blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.

=> Half the people you know are below average.

=> 42.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.

=> The new computers are so humanistic that on Monday morning
they come in late.

=> Live every day like it was your last . . . and it soon
will be.

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