Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Great Public Speaking: Speaker Humor

=> A boring speaker: One who doesnt go without saying.

=> With some corporations quality is their middle name.
The problem is that their first name is "lousy."

=> America is a great country. Where else could a CEO
lose a billion dollars and get a 14 million dollar
bonus for it.

=> I bought a dog that is a cross between a pit bull and
a labrador retriever. At least if he bites my leg
off, he ll bring it back to me.

=> Health care executives are now wearing rubber gloves.
It s not for sanitary reasons. They just dont want
to leave fingerprints on your wallet.

=> Im shooting for immortality. It is a long shot I admit,
but someone has to be first.

=> I listened to my motivational tapes backwards and
became a failure.

=> I always wondered when Im flying if the seat cushion
becomes a flotation device, why cant the plane
become a boat?

=> Old Age: When it takes you longer to get over a good time
than to have it.

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